Women, as they grow older, rely more and more on cosmetics. Men, as they grow older, rely more and more on a sense of humor.

I once heard two ladies going on and on about the pains of childbirth and how men don't seem to know what real pain is. I asked if either of them ever got themselves caught in a zipper.

Only men who are not interested in women are interested in women's clothes. Men who like women never notice what they wear.

To judge from the notions expounded by theologians, one must conclude that God created most men simply with a view to crowding hell.

As soon as laws are necessary for men, they are no longer fit for freedom.