Where does it stop? You get offered money for your wedding, then for your kids, new houses, holidays... We earn enough from football and sponsorships, why do you need any more?

A lawyer I once knew told me of a strange case, a suffragette who had never married. After her death, he opened her trunk and discovered 50 wedding gowns.

If I felt, in the event of a royal wedding, inspired to write about people coming together in marriage or civil partnership, I would just be grateful to have an idea for the poem. And if I didn't, I'd ignore it.

Jody Hill, who I created 'Eastbound And Down' and 'Fist Foot Way' with, was my best man at my wedding.

When planning your wedding you make so many decisions: 'Do I want this fork or that fork?' But in the end people aren't going to remember what napkin holder you choose.