Alcohol may be man's worst enemy, but the bible says love your enemy.

You gotta love livin', baby, 'cause dyin' is a pain in the ass.

I'm supposed to have a Ph.D. on the subject of women. But the truth is I've flunked more often than not. I'm very fond of women I admire them. But, like all men, I don't understand them.

I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day.

The martial music of every sideburned delinquent on the face of the earth.