Always end the name of your child with a vowel, so that when you yell the name will carry.

Fatherhood is pretending the present you love most is soap-on-a-rope.

There is hope for the future because God has a sense of humor and we are funny to God.

The past is a ghost, the future a dream, and all we ever have is now.

The main goal of the future is to stop violence. The world is addicted to it.