A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man.

I believe that if life gives you lemons, you should make lemonade... And try to find somebody whose life has given them vodka, and have a party.

A word to the wise ain't necessary - it's the stupid ones that need the advice.

Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes.

Do not take life too seriously. You will never get out of it alive.