Robert Orben
  • Happiness is a very small desk and a very big wastebasket.

  • Older people shouldn't eat health food, they need all the preservatives they can get.

  • Quit worrying about your health. It will go away.

  • Inflation is bringing us true democracy. For the first time in history, luxuries and necessities are selling at the same price.

  • I take my children everywhere, but they always find their way back home.