Presents don't really mean much to me. I don't want to sound mawkish, but - it was the realization that I have a great many people in my life who really love me, and who I really love.

You know you're getting old when you get that one candle on the cake. It's like, 'See if you can blow this out.'

A gift consists not in what is done or given, but in the intention of the giver or doer.

For my birthday I got a humidifier and a de-humidifier... I put them in the same room and let them fight it out.

You know you're getting old when the candles cost more than the cake.